First Love on the Second Try
by AJ Morrelli
Summary: Challenge fic.  The Warden, after feeling used after Morrigan's ritual, is comforted by Zevran, who knows just how to make him feel better.


((Firstly, I still own nothing of Dragon Age outside of Cassian's name and personality. All the rest belong to Bioware and I'm doing this just for the fun of it. As the summary states, this one is an answer to a challenge fic. Was in the middle of "Homecoming" and had been considering answering the prompt for it anyway when this just sort of fell into place. The final piece of Cass and Zev's story. At least for now. Hope you enjoy!))

* * *

Cassian started, feeling a pair of arms wrap around him and he immediately tried going for the knife beside his bed.

"Shhh, _amor_." Zevran's hold pulled him back to his sitting position, if you could call having your knees pulled to your chest and being nearly curled into a ball 'sitting.' "What happened? Is everything all right?"

He let out a weak chuckle. "Why wouldn't they be?"

Zevran frowned, turning Cassian's face to his own. The dark-haired elf dropped his gaze, not wanting to look Zev in the eyes. "Because you have been crying. And I just saw our delicious witch slinking her way out of your room. That should be cause for celebration, no?"

Cassian's stomach clenched, nearly to the point where he wanted to push Zevran away and find the nearest chamberpot. As it was, he had to suck in a few deep breaths to keep it under control, something that was impossible to hide from the other elf.

"Cassian?" Zevran's tone betrayed his trepidation. "Why was Morrigan here? What did she do?"

Those questions told him he was going to have to answer _very_ carefully or the next thing he was going to have to do was stop the assassin from going after the witch. But he couldn't tell the truth. Doing so would mean giving up one of the Grey Warden's deepest secrets, not to mention one of Morrigan's own.

But hadn't Zevran proven he could be trusted? From the moment he'd sworn his oath, Cassian had never doubted him. Maybe it was foolishness on his part, but something about the words the other elf had spoken stuck him deeply and he welcomed the assassin as openly as he had the others.

"It...was a ritual. To help protect us tomorrow." There. Not a lie and he hadn't given anything away.

The corner of Zevran's mouth turned down slightly. "And she needed _your_ help with it?"

In truth, he could have tried to convince Alistair to lie with her, but the more Morrigan told him about the ritual, even if she were doing it to protect them, which he wasn't wholly convinced that she was, the more he knew he couldn't ask that of the other man. Alistair had enough troubles, being born a bastard himself. He'd never wish that on another. Not to mention the possible consequences of this. No, better he remain ignorant of it all.

"Yes."

"And certain aspects of this ritual required that you remove your clothes?"

"Zev, please, don't ask me to-"

"Cassian." Zevran cupped his cheek, turning his face to him. "Morrigan, did she-"

"No. No." He shook his head. "It...We...talked before anything happened. She didn't...We just..." Maker, his stomach was going to rebel against him yet.

True, Morrigan had explained what needed to happen and had assured him that, in spite of his lack of experience, everything would be fine. Except, now, he didn't feel that way. She'd guided him through the motions, been the one that had drawn him to a shuddering release, and then she'd leaned down, laying a kiss against his forehead.

"You won't regret this, I promise."

And with that, she'd seen herself out the door, leaving him to wonder exactly how true those words were.

Which had been when Zevran had found him. He hadn't realized how much comfort he found in the arms of the other elf. Just hearing his voice had been enough to relax him, but now...now he didn't want him to touch him. While it was true that he'd been with Morrigan willingly, there was no _warmth_, no feelings that _should_ have been there.

"She used you for her ritual and that was all, _amor_?" Zevran asked quietly.

He couldn't make himself form the word. One little word and he couldn't push it past his lips. All he could do was nod and hope the trembling in his chest wouldn't lead to new tears. The word Zevran had chose. "Used." How right he was.

Lips brushed against his cheek and he felt the warmth of Zevran's body pressed against his back, arms wrapped around him in an embrace that felt comfortable. The kisses worked their way to his ear, but there wasn't that shiver of excitement this time. It was something tender instead.

"I'll return soon, _amor_," Zevran whispered, starting to slide off of the bed.

"Zev, don't." Cassian reached out and gripped his hand before he was fully off of the bed. "Morrigan-"

The Antivan tsked. "I've no wish to disturb our lovely witch this evening. I'm going to find something for you, my dear Warden."

"I...don't need anything. Just stay with me? Please?"

Zevran climbed back onto the bed and cupped his cheeks, leaning in to give him a rather tender kiss. Smoothing his hair, the dark-skinned elf then reached down and drew the blankets up around Cassian's shoulders. "I won't be gone long. I promise you."

With that, he slid from the bed and disappeared out the door, leaving Cassian to turn his gaze to the dying fire, not even being able to muster enough energy to get up and tend to the flames.

The room was nearly dark when Zevran returned. The logs had burned to ash and embers and Cassian hadn't bothered to light the candle beside his bed again. The Antivan crossed the room, took a taper off the mantle and brought the burning end to the stem of wax, causing it to bloom to life once again. He wordlessly put his attention back on the fire until it was blazing once more.

"There we are, _amor_." He turned that smile to him. "Now you can see the present I've brought for you."

"Zev, I don't-"

The other elf shushed him and climbed onto the bed, wrapping his arms around him and drawing him back, hands brushing lightly up and down his arms to help relax him. While they were cuddling, a few of the servants brought in a large tub, followed by another pair that filled it with steaming water. Last to enter was one of the girls, bearing a tray of bottles and an array of soaps and combs. She bobbed a curtsey and hurried out after the others.

"It takes time to prepare Cassian soup," Zevran laughed softly in his ear. "Come, my dear Warden, before the water cools too much."

"At this point, I'm used to cold baths." Cassian made no move until Zevran rather forcibly tugged his hand.

"That does not mean you should have to suffer them all the time. Now, into the pot with you." His menacing voice was too touched with mirth to be effective.

Zevran led him over and one fact that he found himself a little disappointed in was that there was no need for the assassin to strip him, already being as he was. Still, they were at least holding hands as he stepped gingerly into the tub, finding the temperature of the water to be rather pleasant, actually.

"No soup, I'm afraid. This is comfortable." He eased down into the water, unable to help the purr that the sensation coaxed from his throat, dunking himself nearly to his neck. This was, most definitely, a luxury, both from before and his time on the road as a Warden.

Zev looked pleased. "Glad I have yet to lose all of my skills that don't focus solely on killing the darkspawn. Now, let's see." He knelt down beside the tub and began picking at the bottles. "Ah."

Undoing the stopper on it, a fresh mint scent became more prominent. Cassian sat up some, watching as the blonde drizzled the contents into his palm before rubbing his hands together and then brushing them across his shoulders.

"A massage, Zev? Isn't it easier when I'm out of the tub?" Cassian grinned at him a little.

"Your job is to relax, _mi amor_. Mine is to help you to be that way." The hands on his shoulder blades slid around to the front of his chest, skimming down to the barrier of the water and back up. Even such a light passing seemed to ease his muscles and he felt himself leaning back into Zevran's arms.

"Aaah!" He sat up a little straighter as he felt a kiss and then a nibble on the very tip of his ear.

Zevran's hands were moving up and down his biceps now, the tease seemingly forgotten in favor of other attentions. Everywhere he seemed to glide his palms felt just the slightest bit less tense and yet, it seemed to make the biggest difference. Fingers kneaded at his neck and shoulders, a pleasured groan rolling in his throat from the attention which would occasionally be broken up by the light brush of the Antivan's lips.

"Now dunk," Zevran ordered gently, gathering up more of the oils and pooling some into his palm. Once Cassian had soaked his hair, Zev began lathering it up, his slight nails scratching along Cassian's scalp, accompanied by the gentle tug of his washing. It wouldn't take much for him to want to sink down into the water again.

Once he was thoroughly rinsed, he leaned back against the tub, very nearly ready to doze off. He woke as he felt the slight weight of Zevran's chin resting on his shoulder, arms circling around him once again. Bringing a hand up, he combed his fingertips through the blonde strands that he could reach.

"Thank you, Zev," he said quietly. "This...really does help."

Zevran reached up and twined their fingers together, bringing them down so he could kiss Cassian's fingertips and nibble on his fingers. "You have had to carry the weight of Thedas, _mi amor_. You share your burden, but not enough. You always keep the heaviest for yourself."

And he still was. Letting out a sigh, he turned slightly, so that he could look Zevran in the eyes. He nearly stuttered on his words again, seeing the unguarded fear in the other's expression. Zev had picked up on something from his tone or his posture, something that told him he wasn't going to like what Cassian had to say, but the Warden knew he had to ask anyway.

"I need a favor from you, Zevran." He dropped his gaze for a moment, then picked his eyes back up. "I need you to help me keep Alistair away from the Archdemon tomorrow. In case Morrigan's ritual doesn't work, I need you to help me keep the king safe."

"Easier said than done, my dear. I know for a fact he wants to put the beast down." The smile Zevran crooked was forced and he could tell.

Cassian shook his head. "It has to be me that kills it, Zev. In case...Just in case."

Zevran cupped his cheek and turned his face back to his. "What aren't you telling me, _amor_?"

Did he really want to admit this? Or, more importantly, did he want to admit it to Zevran? The answer was "No" but his conscience wouldn't let him lie. Zev didn't deserve that.

"Without Morrigan's ritual, whichever Warden strikes the killing blow on the Archdemon dies, Zev." He nuzzled the hand at his cheek. "I can't let it be Alistair."

"But...you said that you and Morrigan-"

"I know what I said. I just...even _she_ doesn't know if it will work, Zev. And we can't take that chance."

Zevran snorted. "Why not?"

Cassian sputtered. "He's the king!"

"Because of you," Zevran spat back. "All of this. The armies. The treaties. This battle. _His_ kingdom. It's all because of you, Cassian. If you hadn't been there with him, do you think all this could have been accomplished?"

"I don't know. May-Yes! What am I saying? Yes, I do."

Another derisive noise. "You have more faith in your fellow Warden than I do. And you should not be selling yourself short. Who says your life is worth less than his, simply because he's king now? It doesn't mean that you have less to lose."

Something cracked in the assassin's voice. It was barely there, but Cassian heard it. "I don't?" he asked gently. "Or you don't, Zev?"

Fingers stroked at his cheek. "I came to you, seeking to end my life, and you saved it. Not just by sparing me, but with everything that you did afterward. You trusted me. You called me friend. You stood by me, even when it meant endangering yourself. Cassian, _mi amor_, you are worth more to me than any king, any country." He paused, swallowing. "I will...help you keep Alistair safe, but if the choice were mine, it wouldn't _be_ a choice."

Zevran's hand slid around to the back of his neck, drawing him into a kiss that was as tender as it was deep. There was want in the kiss, too, but not the lust that had been in other kisses Zev had stolen from him before. This one felt needful, as if this might perhaps be the last thing the two of them ever shared together. And that thought frightened Cassian to his bones.

Bringing his arms up, he wrapped them around the other's neck, twisting around in the water so that he could draw them even closer together. Their kisses couldn't be deep enough. He wanted more, parting his lips and encouraging Zevran with a few flicks of his tongue. The more that they kissed, the tighter he felt his chest growing as regret began to build up, causing him to start to tremble again.

"Cassian?" Zevran drew back, still holding him, but worried for the tears that he felt. "What is it? What's wrong?"

"I should have...been with you." He bowed his head. "I did it...to save Alistair. I couldn't let him...I couldn't let _her_...And I..."

Zevran's arms circled around him, urging him to rest his cheek on the older elf's shoulder. Fingers combing through his hair again, he felt the fingertips of Zev's other hand tracing little circles between his shoulders. "You regret, do you, _amor_? Even because of the reason." He could only nod his head. "Then be with me now." Zevran drew back, bringing a hand up to brush at the remnants of Cassian's tears. "Let me be your first lover."

Still trembling, Cassian brought his lips to Zevran's, trusting the feeling that he got whenever the two of them were close...were intimate...like this. "I'm a little...afraid," he admitted in a whisper.

He felt Zevran smile and then another gentle kiss. "I promise you, _amor_, that this will be something pleasant for the both of us. Now, come. Let's get you dried off and tucked into bed."

Zevran tending to him with the towel was almost as relaxing as the light massage he'd given him while he was in the tub. Once he was dry, he was tugged over to the bed and shooed into it, Zev's mothering making him laugh softly. Leaving him for the moment, Zevran returned to the tray of oils and began examining them again, finally selecting a couple and bringing them over to rest on the nearby table. That done, he began stripping, pausing as he noticed Cassian staring at him.

Feeling heat rise to his cheeks, Cassian dropped his gaze to the bed, finding the rumples in the linens very interesting. He'd no idea why he felt embarrassed. It wasn't as though the two of them hadn't seen each other naked before. There just seemed to be something different about _this_ time. Zevran's soft laughter had his gaze slowly creeping over in the direction of the other elf once again and when he realized that he was laughing _at_ him, the blush returned.

The bed sagged as Zevran climbed onto it once again, settling behind Cassian and wrapping his arms around him once more. "That color suits you, my dear." Lips brushed against his cheek, feeling cool, given the flush there.

"I don't know why I'm-" He shook his head. "And you're not helping."

Another laugh. "Perhaps I should direct my attention elsewhere, then." He began to lay kisses at the back of Cassian's neck, letting them brush their way along his shoulders, pricking up gooseflesh from the added tickle of his breath that accompanied them. The shiver that ran through him felt pleasant and he found himself letting out a little groan, one that made his partner chuckle softly.

Next were the little nibbles at his neck, ones that coaxed him to tilt his head enough to the side to give Zevran plenty of room to let his teeth roam. As he started to tend to his jaw, Cassian felt himself almost holding his breath in anticipation. Zevran's lips brushed at his cheek, allowing him to feel the smile there.

"Is there something you want, Cassian?"

What he wanted was to turn his head and look at him as he answered, but he didn't dare let himself move. Deep, shaky breaths moved his chest and he slid his gaze over, looking at Zevran out of the corner of his eye. Licking his lips, his eyes slipped closed. "Please, Zev."

"Mmm, how much fun it would be to make you beg, but hearing your pleasure, that, I find myself unable to resist." He laid a kiss on Cassian's jaw, just behind his ear, and then slid his tongue along the curve of it, all the way up to the tip.

Even expecting it, Cassian let out a moan, tensing in Zevran's hold. The further attentions of the blonde's tongue had his breathing picking up, accompanied by little whimpers as twinges of pleasure ran through his limbs. Subtle urgings from Zevran had him leaning back against his chest and for just a moment, he felt a hand on his hip before it slid around and had him gasping as he bucked slightly in Zevran's light grip.

"Just relax and enjoy." Zevran's lips brushed against his ear as he spoke, tickling him and adding to the pair of pleasant feelings. Relaxing, though, seemed to be the last thing his body wanted to do, and it wasn't very long before the tension had him arching his back, his hips wriggling in spite of Zevran's hold on them. As the pace started to slow, he let out a whine.

"Don't stop, Zev, please. Please. I'm just...I'm right..."

"I know, _amor_." Both of his hands were resting on Cassian's hips now. "But I have something better in mind." He started to draw away. "I want you to lie back."

No amount of pleading or frustrated sounds would get Zevran to pick up where he left off. Cassian had no other action than to submit to his lover's order, stretching out on the bed. He was at least rewarded with Zevran lightly draping himself over his body, catching his lips up in a deep kiss. Before they could do anything further, he began kissing his way down to Cassian's chest, making him breathe out a chuckle as he felt lips and tongue playing at his nipple.

He could feel Zevran's smile at the sound, reaching up to brush some of his hair back. Doing so caused the Antivan to raise his eyes to meet Cassian's. With a final suckle, he continued trailing kisses down his chest and stomach. Watching him do that, Cassian caught his lower lip in his teeth, his body already tensing, remembering the feelings from the last time Zevran tended to him like that.

And this time was no different. Zevran seemed ready for the jerk of his hips as he began his attentions at his tip. Warmth slowly eased down his length, one hand soothing at his side while the other worked in time with the bob of his lips. Already tense from before, it wasn't long before he was groaning with each flick of Zev's tongue or moment when he felt himself swallowed completely. A flush spread over his skin and he didn't bother fighting the arch of his back, twisting the bed linens as he felt himself on the very edge of tension once again, hearing a voice that didn't seem to be his own begging Zevran not to stop until tight moans and staggered gasps left him mute. The rumble of a delighted purr was what finally drove him to release, the feeling being too much for him to hold back any longer.

Panting, he watched Zevran sit up, hands skimming lightly along the inside of his thighs. Even with the tension fading, the brush of his palms there felt good and there was something about the blonde's expression that was causing another flush to crawl up his skin.

"Hand me that vial, Cassian, please." Zevran nodded to one of the bottles of oil.

"This?" It took him a moment of groping to get the thing, holding it out to him.

Zev smiled, taking it. "That's the one. _Amor_," He nibbled on his bottom lip. "Cassian, I-"

It wasn't like Zevran to be hesitant like this. Watching him with a pinched brow, Cassian pushed himself up to sit in front of his kneeling partner. "Zev? Is something wrong?"

The blonde shook his head. "Nothing, truly. I..." He took in a breath, letting it out slowly. "I asked to be your lover, Cassian, and I...I wish to show you all the pleasures we can share as partners. But I..." He paused, taking another breath. Reaching out, he cupped Cassian's cheek. "_Mi amor_, I ask that you trust me. Trust that I want to give you nothing but the pleasure a lover should give their partner, especially if they are honored enough to share their first time with them."

Listening to him, there seemed such weight in Zevran's words. Gone was the teasing, the moments of stolen kisses, the little intimacies that had often brought them to breathless moments like the one just now. Even the endearment seemed to hold more weight than the casual way he slid it into his speech.

Cassian felt a gentle smile come to his lips. "How could I do anything _but_ trust you, Zev? I just can't help but feel this," he gestured to the two of them, "was too long in coming. I-"

A brief kiss interrupted him. "Then why keep putting it off with words, my dear Warden?"

That made him laugh gently and he leaned in for another kiss, Zevran being the one to keep them almost chaste.

"I want to be with you, Zev. I want to be with _mi amor_." He couldn't help his smile.

A soft chuckle. "My Warden teases me." Zevran started easing him back to the bed again.

"It sounds..." He wasn't sure of the word he wanted, settling on one he hoped would help Zev understand. "Deeper in Antivan. Love is more." He smiled up at the blonde.

There was an expression on Zevran's face he couldn't quite define, but from the look of things, though, he was pleased with the comparison. "Well, then, _amor_, allow me to give you what you want."

The massage between his thighs began again, gentle, relaxing, and making him purr. Curious eyes watched his lover, especially as he paused to open the bottle of oil that he'd taken and coat his fingers with it. Feeling the slick brush of them between his backside had him jumping slightly and Zev laughing gently.

"Apologies, Cassian, but I've no wish to hurt you and so, I need you to endure this before we share further pleasures."

While he didn't exactly like the notion of something hurting, he had placed his trust in Zevran. Nodding, he went back to watching the expressions on his lover's face. Most often, at the moment, was concentration and a twinge of worry any time he let out a sound. If Zevran was going to relax, he was going to have to, too, and concentrating on the brush of his hands really helped with that. Even the play of his slicked fingers was starting to grow comfortable.

"And easy now, Cassian," Zevran murmured, still whispering soothing words as he felt something, a fingertip, wriggle inside of him, making him jolt. "Easy, _amor_. The feeling will get better, I promise."

And Zevran made good on his promise. He took things as slow as Cassian needed him to, easing him into each new sensation, each new step. Tension from nerves was slowly replaced with the pleasant tension of arousal. He found himself answering the gentle thrust of Zevran's fingers once he'd reached that point.

The one thing that continued to amaze him was the look of gentle delight he could see on Zevran's face. Each time he groaned or whimpered, it was an encouragement for his partner and it often led to him doing more things that Cassian was finding he was liking. What also helped was that Zevran had caught up one of his hands and begun to coax him into stroking himself at the same time. For a few heartbeats, they did it together, then Zev left him to his own pleasure, concentrating again on the thrusts of his fingers.

He found himself groaning softly as Zevran seemed to be pressing a bit deeper, stretching him just the slightest bit more with his fingers. As they moved together, something Zevran did had him letting out a gasp of surprise, pleasure seeing to run through him right at that moment. Even just a brief sensation had him wide-eyed and panting.

"Zev, what was-?" he managed to gasp out before the feeling came again, words lost to a high whine, his hips writhing as tension coiled through him again. "Oh, Maker!"

He was seeing sparks dancing in front of his eyes, his chest panting with short gasps as he seemed on the very edge of relief.

"Not the Maker, my dear Cassian," Zevran purred. "Let me hear you."

Another whine, but Zevran wouldn't relent. He wriggled, hands dropping to ball in the linens. "Zevran." He whimpered, but at this point, he didn't care. "Zev, please. Please..."

And it was then he gave in, leaning forward, one hand wrapped around Cassian's length, the other still teasing the spot inside of him. The pair of sensations made his back arch, tension building to a point that had him bucking and crying out as it finally broke.

Zevran's soft words and gentle hands helped to ease him down, panting and blinking his partner back into focus. The blonde let out a content sound and stretched out above him, peppering kisses on his lips.

Shaky arms lifted to wrap around him, pulling Zevran into an exhausted hug. What made him pull back was hearing the Antivan laughing.

"Tired already, _mi amor_? We haven't even shared the best part yet."

"Best part?" There was _more_?

"Mmm. Roll over and I'll help you relax. Then I'll make you feel even better."

He let out a breathy chuckle. "I'm not so sure about that, Zev. I feel pretty damn good as it is."

"You wound me. You think that was my best?"

Cassian felt a bit of a flush come to his cheeks. "Well, given that I don't exactly have anything to compare it to, I can't really say. It did..." He drew in a breath. "It felt...better than when I was with Morrigan."

Zevran's expression softened a little. "I can imagine that's because I know what will make you feel that way, given that I know what I enjoy as well. And what I've come to know that you enjoy, my sweet Cassian." His kisses moved along his jaw, just brushing against his ear, making for a faint whimper. "Let me please you, Cassian. I want to share a night with you that you will always remember."

Cassian's hold grew a little tighter. "How could I forget a night like this, Zev?" He drew back a little so he could look into the amber eyes of the other elf. "And how could I deny my lover so earnest a wish?" Sharing another deep kiss with him, Cassian then drew back, twisting around beneath Zevran so that he was looking at him over his shoulder as he lay on the bed.

He caught sight of the other's smile before he felt kisses trailing down the center of his back, starting at his neck and following the curve of it all the way to his backside. Hands were next, gliding down and easing the remaining tension from his muscles, though as he started rubbing lower, Cassian felt himself twitch a little in anticipation. A soft laugh told him that Zevran felt it, too.

"So eager a lover I have." More kisses at his back, dusting along his shoulders. After sitting up again, Zevran plucked up the other vial of oil and began the same preparations as he did before. This time, Cassian found himself moving with him, it being a little easier having been risen to hands and knees.

As his groans began turning into frustrated whimpers, he felt Zevran's hand rubbing gently at his side. "Are you ready, Cassian? I promise I'll be as gentle as I can be."

Gentle, again. He could only imagine what the feeling would be if Zevran kept giving him reassurances. And yet, there was no part of him that didn't trust the other elf when he said that. "I am, Zev."

A hand brushed along his back, coming to rest at his hip. "Breathe, _amor. _It will make things easier."

Zevran's fingers had been stretching and slicking him, not to mention he felt the oil coating Zev as well, but still, the initial push had him balling the covers into his fists, biting his lip as he held in the cry that it drew from him. Heavy breaths followed, shaking his body and leaving him a little dizzy.

"Easy, Cassian. We'll take things slow." He felt one hand still holding him, the other rubbing at his lower back, Zevran moving just enough to keep him on edge.

Once he could feel like it seemed Zev was fully inside of him, he turned to watch him over his shoulder. Turning back, he dropped his head with another moan as he felt him easing back and then pushing in again. True, there was a bit of an ache, but the movement, the feel of him, had an underlying twinge of pleasure that was enough to keep him from begging the other elf to stop.

The hands on his hips slid up his sides and he felt Zevran giving him a little bit of a tug. "Sit up with me, Cassian."

He looked back at the other elf again. "What? How can I-?"

"Just take things nice and slow. Follow my lead."

Swallowing his nerves, he nodded and pushed himself up a little further, shifting his body at Zevran's touch until it seemed like he was sitting on his lap, back resting against his chest. As they moved again, he let out a groan, feeling him pressed the slightest bit deeper inside of him.

"Feel all right, _mi amor_?" Zevran's hands slid up and down his thighs.

"Yeah," he breathed out. "It's...strange, but it...feels good." He could feel himself flushing again.

"Mmm, and now to help it feel better." One hand stayed on his hip, the other sliding between his legs to begin stroking him there as well. As he moved into Zev's touch, he gasped, given how they were still sitting, and he heard a purr from Zevran. "Don't be afraid to move. Just take things as slow as you wish."

Leaning back against him, he was encouraged to move his hips, the dual sensations starting to slowly build up the tension in his muscles again. It seemed strange, doing that and yet, he felt relaxed at the same time. Or he was relaxed until he felt a nibble on his earlobe once again.

"Zev, don't." He reached a hand up, catching up some of the blonde's hair to tug him back a little.

"Why not? This way I can please you in so many ways all at once." His tongue wriggled in Cassian's ear, eliciting a surprised whimper and the tightening of his grip on Zevran's hair.

"I can't. You'll...I..."

Zevran wasn't listening, his attention rather merciless at this point. The stroke of his hand was constant, even with Cassian's fingers curled around his own. His hips seemed to roll with each of Cassian's bucks, keeping the two of them snug together and pressing him even deeper inside. When he reached that same spot inside of him as when he was using his fingers, Cassian lost his voice to the cry that he let out, more of a croak, but one that was nothing but pleasured.

The sparks from before were back, only this time, they seemed to be racing through him. From the tingle from his ears to the tension in his lower body, his body felt like a bowstring, held tight, trembling and waiting for that moment when he could just let go. Though it didn't seem like Zevran was going to let him off so easily, slowing his paces and not tending quite so vigorously, drawing the feeling out until he was mewling, begging with each gasp. Tighter and tighter his body seemed to grow until the sensations brought him over the edge, the wriggle of Zevran's tongue, the pull of his grip around him, the full thrust of him inside of him. His release had him crying out Zevran's name, barely hearing his own murmured over and over from the Antivan's lips.

More than anything, he wanted to kiss him. Turning as best he was able, he caught the corner of Zevran's mouth with his lips, there needing to be no other hint for his partner. Arms circled around him, Zevran leaned closer, pulled into a deeper kiss as Cassian's fingers slid into his hair again. Though he could barely catch his breath, he didn't care. He wanted this more than air. More than anything.

It was Zevran who broke the kiss, drawing back with his name a question on his lips. It wasn't until he felt the kiss on his cheek that he realized he was crying. "What is it, _amor_?" he asked quietly, the faintest touch of uncertainty in his tone.

"Nothing. Nothing. I...Let me look at you. Let me hold you."

With soft groans, the two of them eased apart. Cassian became suddenly aware that his muscles felt very weak, barely holding himself up as he turned around, wrapping his arms around Zevran and drawing them close once again. He could feel Zevran's hand rubbing up and down his back, that helping him a little, though he still felt wobbly, even though he was only kneeling.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, continuing before Zevran could ask him why. "It just...I feel so...good. I don't know why I'm crying," he chuckled. "Joy. Relief. I just..." He drew back, blinking the hazy shine away from his eyes. "You've been so good to me, Zev, even when you tease." He flashed him a grin. "I-"

He was interrupted by another kiss. "You deserved to be treated so well, my Warden. Even if I were teasing. I know you enjoyed it." A rich laugh rumbled in his throat, something Cassian could feel in his chest as well. "I am honored to be your lover, Cassian." Cupping his cheek, Zevran laid several slow kisses against his lips. "And I can't wait to share even more pleasures with you."

_Then Maker please let Morrigan's ritual work_, Cassian prayed silently. _Don't take this away from him. _"It took me a while to realize it, but there's no one I would rather have as my lover than you, Zev," he murmured against the Antivan's lips. "I love you and I want tonight to be the first of many that we share together."

He could see the question plain in those amber eyes. Love? To be a lover was one thing to Zevran, but love was another matter and Cassian knew it. And then the look softened, accepting the word, accepting the feelings behind it. "That you will have, Cassian. I can swear nothing less to my love." He sealed the promise with another kiss, drawing the two of them down to the bed to sleep content in one another's arms.


End file.
